The Missing Constellation

I start to get annoyed, just wanting to get this the fuck over with and get the phone.

"Look if I get the fax machine too will you just give me the phone?"

Vahn:
"It's a done deal, my man." The salesman reassured as you exchange him the cash. He gives you the phone and throws you the behemoth dinosaur that is a fax machine, knocking you to the ground. Fuck this thing weighs like a thousand Tiri's, and why you'd ever use her as a unit of measurement you will never know. But on the other hand you got the new phone you were after. Why don't you try it out and tell someone what just happened?

Contact List:
Vivian
Kal
Ivan
Tiri
Isabella
Sheena
Hazel
Reed
Riley
William
Madeline

>

I'll call up William and ask him if he wants a new fax machine....

"Sounds like a plan." Riley hangs up the phone.

Vahn:
Really? You wanna call that douchebag? Alright...

Unlocked Character Profile: William

Spoiler:

William: "Hm? Oh it's you, out of all people. What could you possibly want? Money, perhaps? Sorry but I don't give handouts. So fly away, you hungry pigeon."

>
Riley:
Well it looks like you've got a busy evening ahead. Now that all that is over, you can either go out in the town some more with your free time, or go ahead and go back to the restaurant to set everything up for your guests.

>

"No no, I have something for you. A new fax machine! I'll sell it cheap too."

Vahn:
"You're joking, right? I have ten fax machines, and they're so expensive they scan and print money to my associates. I don't need your blasted piece of trash. Of course, I don't really need anything, for I have just about every random thing anyone could ever want. Speaking of which, my parents bought an authentic pirate ship the other day and it's in our backyard as a decorative piece."

>

"Really? That's pretty cool....Maybe you wouldn't mind taking this fax machine off my hands?"

Vahn:
"I don't want it, especially if you've got your disease-ridden hands all over it. Besides, you seem like a fax machine type of person. I'd suggest you keep it."

>

"But it's old and heavy....Fine, I guess you aren't interested in this fax machine. Well bye." I hang up. "Damn, I'm stuck with this heavy thing. Maybe Ivan or Riley would like it...."

Vahn:
They probably wouldn't, just throwing that out there. Well now you're stuck in the crowd of the mall with a large ass fax machine. What do you want to do now?

>

I could probably throw it off a building and watch it go boom....Nah.

I take that heavy shit back to my apartment.

Vahn:
You drag that fax machine back to your place as the crowd looks at you obviously jealous of your new swag. After lifting the fax machine up the flight of stairs like carrying the weight of the sins of mankind, you finally set the damn thing in the corner. Well here you are, back at your humble a-bro-de. What will you do now?

>

I leave Ivan a message on SEAPE - "Hey I got this new fax machine....You like machine stuff right? Wanna come work on it some?".

Vahn:
It seems you have already grown to accept your prized possession. How very mature of you. You spin around in your chair a while out of boredom pondering what to do next.

>

I'll go check out the club. There's probably no one there at the moment, but I might as well look around it some since I got nothing better to do. Oh yeah and I take a kunai with me.

I'll go back to my restaurant, and prep for tonight. And I don't want the fucking fax machine, don't try.

Vahn:
You make your way to the club which is probably empty because it's still the daytime. Expecting the unexpected, you arm yourself with a ninja throwing knife. As you walk down the stairs you receive a text message:

Code:

SOON THE CITY SHALL BURN

...Must be the wrong number.

Just as you expected the club is empty and you shout sarcastically, "Oh my God, the club activity is dead, guys." You then shrug and practice a few jams on your audio mixers, eventually getting bored of that as well. Man, you really need a new hobby or something. You throw your kunai at the plant for the hell of it and hear a distinct, "OW!" You look back at in shock and yell, "What the hell?! Talking plant!" Upon closer inspection, you merely hit a guy who was standing behind the plant. This raises questions.

>
Riley:
Feeling like an evil mastermind you return to your lair of the pasta and begin setting your intents to motion. You head to the kitchen to cook up that lasagna, and some fettuccine for the shopkeeper. Right on schedule, Hazel arrives in and takes a seat, and you place the plate at the table as classy as fuck as you can. It's time to set the pièce de résistance with some ambience music. You pop a nickel in the jukebox and begin to play a track. Make your choice.

1) Great Vacation - Dirt Poor Robins
2) One Night In Bayou - The Brothel Creepers

>
Kal:
You really can't complain as you got a phone for free. Speaking of which, you ought to call someone up and tell them the good word.

Contact List:
Vivian
Vahn
Ivan
Tiri
Isabella
Sheena
Hazel (!)
Reed
Riley
William
Madeline

Huh, you got another message from Hazel.

>

I go check out who's spying on me. "I've got more where that came from, so come out with your hands up!" I only brought one with me, but he doesn't need to know that just yet.

Vahn:
The man slowly steps out and complies, with his lower abdomen bleeding. "Look man, I just wanted your frickin' plant, why you gotta be throwing knives at me?!"

>
Kal:

Code:

Hazel: "I just wanted you to know that you're a total spaz, cheers. Also, I'm gonna chill at the pasta place, so don't follow me or nothin'. Later asswad."

Getting real sick of your shit, Hazel. Maybe you'll call her back and tell her off, although that is very unlikely. You are too much of a timid bitch. Perhaps you'll just talk to someone else.

>

"Oh....uh....Sorry. I really didn't know you were behind the plant. Why the heck are you trying to steal a plant anyways??